There, again, is the sound of ships
in the bay.
Night comes late these past months
so I delude myself into
thinking there is the freedom
of abstract time.

There, again, is the disconnect.
Wires, pills, a body separated from mind,
like the red scar on my knee,
shiny pieces of skin, wired by nerves
and dissolved by invading flesh;
it refuses to heal.

Mingling and dancing like sunspots on water,
my thoughts, too, fly away from me.
Balloons in the air, trees on the rooftop,
it comes to me in flashes of dizziness,
pixellated lights, screens blurry with black
and white. My eyes, those traitors,
they too, refuse me.

Don't say it. If you say it the spell
will break. More than anything,
it is that which keeps me
tipping forward, leaning by a draw.
 
Hover, and I will say the words.
Say them across a universe.
And I will breathe for you, swim
to you past a narrowing strait.

Like the wind who howls,
ever narrowing, ever receding.
And still I am in a room
that hears nothing.

KYAAA~ ;______; ♥

Why so cute? Whywhywhy? DDD:

I woke up at 6:50am this morning because a wasp got into my room even though both my door and window were closed? Interesting. Anyway, now it's 1:20pm and I need to SLEEP but ksihdfjsd I have to write a 2000 word report. I'll do it later. Yes I will >.>;

VoicePost 288K 1:26

“Hey guys, I have to do this by voice post because I have to talk to Sab. I can't I can't type it out. Katie just had a beautiful, beautiful really beautiful baby boy. He's 19ins and he weighed 5 pounds something ounces, I can't really talk, just too busy focusing how beautiful he was and how sweet he sounded when he cried and yeah he's just that was probably the most emotional thing I've, I've ever done is been in a waiting, you know a delivery room and I couldn't stop crying. I literally could not stop crying, but yeah she, she made it through ok, he made it through ok. None of the clothes we got him are gonna fit because he's a preemie(?) but we'll make do somehow. I'll probably edit this post later cos I know no one likes voice posts and I'm gonna go ahead and get out of here now and go talk with the family and cry some more, but yeah. Zac Hugh Philly Rose. Came into the world at 3:45am Central Time. Yeah. Bye.” Auto-Transcribed Voice Post

ER. his name is not.... zach hugh philly rose. yeah. sdkjfhsdfjk it's matthew lee rose, dies. sdkjfsdjkf

ugh, i am so drained guys. and i didn't even have a kid, but like. ugh ugh ugh must go die now. ♥ iluall

*tears yoooo and yooo and yoooooooooooo apart*


WHATEVER HAPPENED TO BASIC ICON ETIQUETTE?!
*dies*

damn, idk why i am so worked up but,
dang yooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

T^T
-


and whoever said only 13 couldn't co-exist with sanity.
bullshit.

i am only 13, and i am sane.
i don't know about you.

-






i. am. die-ying.

I SHOULDN'T HAVE NOT GONE TO SCHOOL.
not that there's school today,
butbutbut, aish.

BOREDOM T___T

When evaleva tells me to write YooSu badfic in Korean, who am I to refuse?

Title: 나 니 불알 삘고 싶어
Pairing: YooSu
Rating: NC-17!!!
Genre: angst/fluff/smut/crack
Language: Korean lololololol.
A/N: Lulz, don't kill me? I typed this all myself and I didn't use a translator. Any spelling mistakes are my own fault because I've had three hours sleep and OMG I'm going back to bed nao D: English translation follows the Korean. A+++ for making out in korean

XD Enjoy! ( click for smexy boys lolololol )

KATIE MIGHT HAVE THE BABY TONIGHT.


OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

JKSDFHLSDJKHFLJKSDHFJKHSDLKFHSJKDHFLKSJDHAFJKSHDJKFHSDJKLFHJKSDHFJKASF

IDEK I'M GOING TO BE AN AUNT HOLY FUCK IT'S BEEN SO LONG SINCE WE HAVE A BABY AROUND AHHHHH YOU GUYS OH MY GOD. OH. MY. GOD. SDKJFHSDJKFHSDF


CRIES A LOT SHE NEEDS TO HURRY AND HAVE IT. I CANT TAKE THIS.


EDIT OMG SHE JUST CALLED BACK CONTRACTIONS ONE MINUTE APART SDJKFHSDJKLHFJKLSDHFJKSDHF TTYL

edit. :||| false alarm...ish. she's dilated to 4cm, and fully effaced! so it could be ~anytime. they gave her some meds to help her sleep through the pain, because even though she's not like, majorly close, she's getting there.

but yeah, no baby tonight, woes. BUT TY FOR ALL THE COMMENTS EVEN THOUGH I'M RLY EMBARRASSED RIGHT NOW DIES. >.>;;;;; ♥♥♥

jason, bb. :((((((( i'm sorry you had to go butbut. you must bring out an album soon, mkay? and more pretty pictures for me to icon. jason hwaiting! ♥

finally done with the narrative poems. the first one's about the most magical place i've ever been to - the bathroom. xD the second one seems kinda psychotic, though... and the word de-fan-ment, forget everything about it. it doesn't even sound nice. xD

( so, let's see. a poem about the bathroom and a psychotic poem about a princess behind the cut? )

so anyway, THE HAPTIC CF. OH GOD. JUST. LET ME FANGIRL. THE JAEMIN. I DIE. AND THE UTTER GHEINESS THAT IS HOMIN. DEARLORDIDIEDIEDIEDIEDIE. AND THE CHUNJAE BUTT POKING. I SPAZZ SO HARD. (and pach_unni can definitely attest to this. xD)

WILL GET TO SCAPPING AND IKKONING THE CF TOMORROW (if i could). EEEEEK. i have made far too many icons today. 86 sujuman icons. yes, sujuman alone. add around 10 icons that i made for the recent airport pics and the 50+ i made yesterday. so yes, i shall spam with icons tomorrow. meanwhile, i flail so madly at the fact that i have a kyumi icon.. heck, i even have a zhoumi icon. and i said i won't fangirl kyumi/zhoumi. kill me now. (i am also loving my NEW default icon. yes, i changed it just now. i fail so much at life, don't i?)

... HOSHIT I JUST WATCHED THE SECOND CF. OHGODTHEHOSUAIYEEEEEEEEEEEE. OTPWHYPLEASEMORENAO.

never have i spazzed so hard. so many pairs. so much love. aish.
will just finish DLing the last CF then i'm off to bed. lots of chores to do tomorrow. and i'll finally be seeing my friends on friday after so long! :D

... and the sariaya pics. why do i fail so much? will post them tomorrow. i mean later. sometime in the afternoon? i don't know. i can't think straight right now. what. xD

[EDIT]
ZOMGWTFSUWHYSOCUTE. YOU BLOOD PRESSURE AISH. AND THE NAVER COMMENT. PURE WIN. I DIE. SERIOUSLY.

OKAY. SLEEPING NOW. REEZA, YOUR HEART BE STILL. xD
[/EDIT]

GUYS I WANT TO STEAL DAVID ARCHULETA AWAY AND HIDE IN MY ROOM FOREVER TO JUST PINCH HIS CHEEKS AND DOTE UPON. SDJKFHLSDJKHFSDJKFH SERIOUSLY OH MY FUCKING GOD

SO

FUCKING

CUTE

OHGODDDDDDD WANNA PINCH HIS CHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKS


edit: sdjkfhsdjkfhsjkldhfjkasdfhsdjkf jason ;-; omfg i want you to stay but i don't want you to be another sanjaya cries a lot. sdkfjhsdjkf DD:

Because I just watched the Saitama Super Arena fancam of Love in the Ice. Because then I started listening to the Soul Power live version and searched for the lyrics. Because Junsu cries out 切ないほど美しい愛だから, every time, in a voice about to cry, and I remember why I love and hope and put my heart into this band.

A quick, spur-of-the-moment translation.

The entire reason I decided to translate were for these two sentences alone: 切ないほど美しい愛だから, 儚いほど麗しいこの時を— when Junsu sings those two sentences, every time, I'm so moved. English does not do those two sentences justice; neither did the other translation I read, which, although very accurately translated, was incredibly literal & mangled those two amazing lines. :|

If you haven't already heard it, please do. This is live, and it's beautiful and heartbreaking. Junsu's part starts at 3:18. This is my favorite live ballad performance of DBSK, ever. (Though I'm can't wait until the T concert DVD comes out & I can watch them perform Kiss shita mama, sayonara. EDIT: OMFG I JUST HEARD LIVE RIP OF KISS SHITA MAMA SAYONARA T_T IT'S AMAZING I'M SO MOVED RIGHT NOW THIS IS MAKING ME CRY.)

If you want to use these translations, please credit me at _happy_as_rain_ ☆彡



東方神起 - Love in the Ice

not that i'm jumping on the bandwagon. it's just that i also want to share my two cents (but i'll just paste my reply to the conversation i had with pach_unni earlier this evening regarding the entire yoosumin tirade.

they should take the matter not as a ground for disappointment of de-fan-ment (what) but as a... form of amusement. it's fanservice. JAPAN, PEOPLE. is it so hard to understand? sige, matakot kayo sa mangyayari sa fans nila sa korea, pero don't look down on them. (translation of the last part: okay, you can be afraid of how the korean fans would take it, but don't look down on them.)

out your thoughts on the issue, if you'd like. i'm open to not-entirely-nice comments and such.



that aside, i've managed to come up with some icons today. 54 icons total, all involving the saitama pics. i'll be waiting for more tomorrow. they're bound to come in TONS. xD and the sujuman pics! gawd. WHY MUST THERE BE KYUMI (kyuhyun x zhoumi)? AND WHY DO I FIND THEM CUTE? o.o I NEED KYURY. GIVE ME MY KYURY, FANDOM. and the audio of kiss shita mama sayonara. OHGOD. MY STUPID BROKEN HEART. SAVE ME.


random: i seem to have a thing about breaking nowadays. i've been using it frequently in fics. it's quite amusing. ^^; these palace walls break/ when the cool rain comes rushing down (down, down)/ and the doors are lowered/ so that the rainwater could come in. (from a narrative poem i'm making for the school publications) it might be a new writing style.

i am loving my new default pic. and my new su icon.

still need to finish the narrative poem. why am i talking about princesses in my poem again? i've never been good at poems, really. they always come out... weird. there is no breathing space/ when we talk about blue skies (grayed by the rain)/ sunny days (hidden in between clouds) i'm better off with short stories.

i am so random, really. pardon the randomness. i'm weird like this, yes. :D
hope to hear from you all.♥

[EDIT]
i'll post the pics tomorrow... hopefully. i fail at life, really.
[/EDIT]

[AND ANOTHER EDIT]
Dear juudenkanryou. I don't really know how to tell you this, but I'll join the monastery. I think I realized it when your dwarf bit me in your camping car, and I saw you carve your initials into Manchester United's goalkeeper. I'm sure you're masochistic enough to understand that Extreme Home Makeover sucks. I'm returning your ring to you, but I'll keep your mom as a memory. You should also know that I always wanted to break Cocaine abuse. Go burn, aoireeza <3.

( oh well. )

http://www.veoh.com/videos/v86056002HxqK7Jd

LMFAO OMG. BI ILUSM. 'I DON'T THINK SO' UGHHHHH YESFHSDJKHLJKSD

ELEVEN MORE DAYYYYYYYS UNTIL I'M MEETING PEOPLE AND WATCHING MAH BOYS OMG. *_* yeah, i'm counting down. WHAT. lmfao. idek, it's like, the ONLY thing getting me through work lately. we had two people quit and it's like, hell again. sdkfhdjk cries a lot.

i told a few people i'd take pictures of my serving tray, which i decorated all prettyful-like ;D maybe now i'll get some asian attention on fridays and saturdays. dies.

un-zoomedish ;; zoomedish 8DDD ISN'T IT AWESOMESAUCE? i'm so proud of it omg. it's my baby :3 for those of you who don't know, i'm a busser at a restaurant, and to prevent the major loss of silverware (people keep throwing it away accidentally or smth, idk) we've had lately, we have to use trays to bus tables now. :// which is awkward but i'm working on ~perfecting my balance.

also, either sometime tonight or tomorrow, expect a jaechun mix. I HAD TO DO IT OKAY. :|||||

ok. i have it all worked out.

junsu was jeluz and had to join in on the fun and claim his chun back from the evil hands of changmin-sama.

but now, we have jaejoong. umma wants his chunface back. that's the next round gaiz. yeahh.

yunho....will be thought up later. when i'm not sdjklfhsdjkfhklsdhfjksdhfjk all over the fucking place HOLY FUCK BOYS WHY. WHYYYYYYYY ;; my poor brain cannot handle. the hot. D: